90210: My Generation?

Beverly Hills 90210 is ending. Or so I was recently informed. I'm not really sure how I feel about that, except that as I sit here in my cubicle pondering the show, I'm realizing that much as I loathe to admit it, Beverly Hills 90210 briefly defined my generation.

First of all, I'm the same age as Brandon, Brenda, Kelly, Donna, Dylan and Steve. Also Andrea, but she's been gone so long I can hardly remember her. Once she had that baby, it was all over. But I clearly remember that they graduated from high school as the Class of '93--and the episode aired during the same week as my own graduation that spring. I felt a bond with these characters, even though by the end of their third season they had all been through a whole lot more than I had. Kelly had been through her slutty phase and was already over it; I wouldn't enter mine for about another 4 years. Brenda and Dylan had started their intense relationship, consummated it, and already had a pregnancy scare; I have yet to have a relationship that qualifies as "serious" (i.e. more than 3 months and not based solely on getting drunk with the same person at every opportunity). Andrea got into Yale; the bastards rejected me.

In a way, the 90210 kids were paving the way for me and my friends. I had watched them go through these situations and saw how they handled them. Jim and Carol were decent parents who I liked to think acted pretty closely to how my own parents would. I was ready to face the world, thanks to those kids from West Beverly High.

Then it all changed. After 3 years of being trendsetters, all of a sudden the kids from Beverly Hills fell behind the times. They fell behind my times, anyway. I mean, seriously. They all went to college together and stayed friends. How many of you are best buddies with the WHOLE crowd of people you went to high school with? I think I keep in touch with exactly one person who was a Class of '93 Spartan with me. And that beach apartment? Come on. In my wildest dreams I could never afford that place--in college I was broke and dorm livin', eating cafeteria food and Ramen noodles to stay alive.

And the biggest difference between the 90210 kids and real college life? I'll give you exactly one guess. Yup: the booze. Not only did they NOT drink in college, they looked down their noses at everyone who did. Remember the season when Steve was big into the KEG house (Whatever. Fraternities are ridiculous but they have enough self-respect to at least not call themselves the "Keg" house) and he started drinking "all the time"? They practically had to have an intervention because the guy discovered that he liked to party. In college. When his biggest responsibilities were getting up at 10 a.m. to get to a class that no one cared if he skipped and maintaining a minimum of personal hygeine.

COME ON. I can understand getting all preachy when Kelly was dating Colin the Drug Dealer (I think that's how he was listed in the credits) or when she joined the cult, but beer? In college? The high school parents obviously had too much hold on the writers by this time.

As things moved on and school ended, the show had the kids moving onto the "real world." Now, I don't think that I'm all that cynical, but not ONE of them got a job with a consulting firm. They all look like the Andersen type, don't you think? None of them works in a cubicle. None of them are broke or bitching about college loans. The "real world" for these people in no way resembles mine!

And they still don't drink.

My interest in 90210 waned sometime mid-college and I moved on to more entertaining, realistic fare like Melrose Place. Jake, Jo, Michael, Jane, Allison, and Billy quickly replaced the West Beverly crew in my heart and Beverly Hills 90210 was relegated to "the show that comes on before Melrose".

Sorry, kids. I can't say I'll miss you, but you had a good run. It's time to move away from home though--after all, you're almost 25, right?